As humans, we all experience the day to day interactions with other humans. Sometimes we don't get along as well with one another. Sometimes people do rude and immoral things to us and it shakes up our world. We let others ignite our emotions and take control of out reactions, but sometimes we stay cool.
Whether someone cut you off in traffic or downright lied to your face, you have felt the strangling hang of vengeance take a hold of your consciousness. Part of us loves to hold onto that resentment and anger as if it gives us some sense of drive and purpose. We leave our rational minds and sink into a place of primitive behavior fired up by fight or flight Amygdala response. We simply exempt ourselves from self ownership and point the finger towards the ones that have hurt us. We let them define our emotional well being through actions out of our control. This is part of our genetic makeup that has lived with us all through out evolution. To progress, we must learn about our vindictive behaviors and how them came to be.
Instead of creatively using the energy that anger, resentment, and jealousy give us, we succumb to the emotions themselves. Instead of stepping back and recognizing our feelings, we choose to hold onto the moments and lock them in our subconscious and store it in our bodies. We condition out brains into thinking that vengeance is what another person deserves by their unacceptable behavior. We create walls separating us from the humanity of the aggressor. We choose to live in a state of unawareness and unconsciousness.
If one were to adhere to the Buddhist concept of compassion, one would understand the inherent suffering resentment causes to the self more than the aggressor. Recognizing your emotions without oppressing them is the first key in stepping out of a victim and vengeance based consciousness. How silly it is to carry such disdain for another person. What a stealer of joy and limiter of growth.
Understand that you are only responsible for how you to choose to react to a hostile person. Your reaction inwardly and outwardly are the prime factors of self ownership. Being attentive and alert to what the moment is presenting will present a solution with ease. Of course since your mind is conditioned to react in a socially animalistic fashion, it will feel very hard at first to not aggress towards your aggressor. When you understand that your mood is all based on choice and awareness of emotion, you will learn to interact in a compassionate and nonviolent manner.
You can be in full control on how you choose to react to a situation and environment. When you see that manipulative guilt, raising of the voice, blaming, passive aggression and aggression are completely irrational and unhelpful, you will have the insight to learn about yourself and common man.
The torturous thorns of vengeance dig deeper for each time you choose to welcome and take control of it in your life. Resisting vengeance is part of vengeance itself. When you resist vengeance, you are pouring your energy in trying to get rid of emotion. You are making an unconscious decision to escape the moment. You are saying no to the present moment and making a decision to not look inward and listen. When you invite the vengeance demons over for tea, you allow them to speak their minds and say their words. When you do not argue with the demons, they will leave. They are simply of the mind and thieves of joy.
The interactions between aggressive and unconscious people allow you to look inward awhile applying empathy and compassion. You will see the person as a part of yourself and an opportunity to look inward, take initiative and truly take what it takes to help them out. It is not your job to fix the person. It is your job to listen and bring your presence to the situation. The ego loves to try to solve things and use manipulative tactics to get a means to an end. Vengeance moves through the ego and you are the one to choose how you react. Fight and flight are the leftover mammalian survival responses that can manifest itself through trickery, anger and vindictiveness.
Presence is the opposition of vengeance. Presence holds the ability to accept and forgive. To understand the why of the emotions at play. Simply accepting yourself unconditionally in the present moment is the key to honesty and vulnerability. When you become present, vengeance is a most absurd and outdated frame of mind.