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Sunday, July 17, 2016

Thank you for this pain.

Thank you for this pain.
Thank you for showing me how I can grow from this pain. Seeing the pain as a teacher to wake up and grow from.
( Flowers growing from the dead remains of plants and animals ) 
This suffering that is of the mind. 
The suffering that so wants to become the host of my consciousness. 
It wants you to ignore it. 
So you resist it...
It still persists. 
So you try to numb it or drown it..
It comes creeping back in. 
You become exhausted. Both in the mind and in the body. 
We have tried to use this pain as fuel. 
This unchecked energy that drains us and has us reach for things in the outside world. The unconscious seek for comfort through comforting things. 
The lust for sugar and chemicals. The desire for a human to have us unload and vent our frustrations. The desire to escape and just turn off from what is really bothering us.

Discomfort turns into our enemy and not our friend. Discomfort is there for you to experience to become comfortable with. Discomfort is there to show you what is wrong and what needs to be worked on. How grand is it that we can experience such varying degrees of discomfort? How great is it that we consciously change how we react to it? 

I have noticed this pain to be vital. Vital in reminding myself to reconnect with the present moment. To remind myself to simply breathe and let it pass. Not to jump so quick to fix it, but look at it directly. Not with a puffed chest. Not with a cowering bend. But with the surrender of a smile and the closing of the eyes. Let ting it arise. Letting it breathe. Seeing it as the thoughts that have created so much pain in and from the past. 

This is not the pain of a chronic disease of the body. It is chronic if it remains unconscious. This "dis" ease is the compulsion of thought. This vicious style that stirs up the pot. This storm creates the anxiety and the discomfort. This then can lead us into a "depression". We repeat our bad habits. Going for the same things that have never worked for us. Going for the instant relief. We have forgotten about our internal work. We have forget to ask for or even allow ourselves inner peace. 

We can resist or simply feel what all this "mind pain" is doing to us. We can label all we want and analyze, but that only stays in the mind. We can feel with our whole body. We can feel it in our chest right next to the heart. With the heart, it needs no resistance. With the heart, it can surrender to what is and know that clinging to "what was" is what is creating so much harm. 

It is not so much something we should "fix". This pain isn't here for us to fix. This pain is here to help us become more conscious and to reveal how the past and the identity with the past has created so much unconsciousness and turmoil. 

We can invite those dark demons in.
We can be gentle. We can let them make their speeches. Once we see that are passing through, they will transmute into presence. They will dissolve into a peaceful soup of awareness. We can be so grateful for our pain that it is unbearable. These passing discomfort demons become the best teachers for our internal work. Our internal garden of infinite opportunities. Most importantly our inner peace which makes us more present, attentive, engaged and able to unconditionally love no matter what circumstance or passing storm. 


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