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Wednesday, June 29, 2016

"You're not really here."


...

You're not really here. 
Sure, you exist in a 24 hour period running errands and completing tasks, but you are not really here. Right now. Right now in every moment. 
Your head is swimming in thoughts. 
Worries. Compulsions. Judgments. 
Criticisms. Imagination. Ideas. Etc.

There is nothing wrong with it, but surely you leave no space for the present. No space to witness the mind doing all these things. You simply follow the mind. You let it be your master. You let it run your days in your life. 

You're in traffic driving your car, thinking about what to get at the grocery store. You get agitated by the heat and the amount of traffic. You realize you forgot to pay your gas bill on time. A surge of discomfort and anxiety rushes up and down your body. Your whole physiology has changed. Now the simple task of going to the grocery has become more stressful. 

Then a friend texts you wanting to hang out. You respond and quickly forget what you needed to get next at the grocery store. Classic you. You look around and see a catchy packaged bag of sweets. You can splurge. You can give it a try. 

Later you find out that you forgot an important thing on your grocery list. You're almost home so there's no turning around. You feel sad and angry all at the same time. The rest of your day seems to go down hill. 

Out of all of these tasks we do in the day, we weren't present for all of them. We stumbled, juggled and multitasked to the best of our abilities, but left little to no room for presence and stillness. You were physically executing all these tasks. You were mentally there. You just weren't mindful of everything going on. You hopped into and identifed with every passing emotion. You rushed from point a to point b. You never took the time to look inward to reasses and recenter. 

You were there, but not ALL there. 
You weren't in totality with each event. When you were picking out apples, you were briefly glancing over them while worrying what other fruits fit into your budget. You weren't totally aware. 

You were trapped in your own mind. You were going through the motions without witnessing the emotions. You never focused in your breath. Breathing in the stress and releasing the stress. Where were you exactly? 

You were of the mind. 
You were there, but not really there. 
You were buried. Maybe you didn't even know it. You were unconscious. Maybe even as you read this, it will trigger a memory of you not totally "there". So you may have not been here for this whole reading. You let imagination sweep you and take your attention. You let thoughts and worries take the driver's seat. Hopefully by now all you are doing while you are reading this is "reading this." 

Surrender. 

Surrender to the unseen. 
Surrender to the uncertainty of being with your doing. 
Instead of filling your days with doing, try focusing on filling your days with being.
It's not hard. 
It's easy.  
Just like everything is easy when you break it down step by step. 
It's all easy, relaxed and mindful steps.
Our minds create the drama.
Our minds create the anxiety. 
Our minds perpetuate the same habitual cycles we have been comfortably uncomfortable with. 

So what do you do? 

Show up. 
Be present. 
That's all that matters.
You project what you are present with. 
You attract what you project.
Ease into uncertainty with every breath and every step. 
Ease into just being here. Now. Continually. 
If you don't, you will be "here" too late.
Or will you? It's your choice. 

Talk a walk. 
Take a breath.
Notice that wherever the path takes you, 
You were totally there! 

DG

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